beardface.

Hey there blogbuds.

This is a blogpost dedicated to the ever-changing terrain that is Tim Felton's face. Speaking as objectively as I can, I would say the face possesses some conventionally attractive features: good symmetry, strong brow, proportionate mouth. In fact, it has even been compared to the likes of Tom Cruise before.

However, these features are not what I love most about Tim's face. I believe two things make Tim's Face stand out above others: Variability and Elasticity.

1. Variability - Tim's face is constantly changing. The design of his facial hair, the bushiness of his eye-brows, the depth of the bags under his eyes....always different. He also changes up his look by varying the length (and greasiness) of his cranial hair. It's unpredictable and exciting.

2. Elasticity - I like to smoosh Tim's face with my hands. He likes to smoosh my face too, but my little flat Asian face is not nearly as elastic. Tim's cheeks stretch out and squish together really nicely, providing minutes of entertainment for the smoosher. Tim also enjoys contorting his face for his own personal entertainment. I have caught him doing this in the bathroom mirror before, when he didn't think I was watching. (He also makes up voices to go along with the faces, but that's another blog post for another day).

If you haven't seen Tim recently, I will update you on the latest look. He had been growing his facial hair out since the end of October and it was longer than you would ever desire a beard to be (unless you are a wizard of some sort). Unkept and scraggly, it was an excellent place to store excess condiments and cookie crumbs.

In case you didn't know, I am not the kind of wife that cares about her husband's physical appearance. I don't care how he dresses or what his facial hair looks like (1). In fact, I sort of enjoy when he looks a little gross, it keeps all the hot ladies at a distance. This being the case, I encouraged Tim to see if he could muster the endurance to grow the beard for an entire year.

But he couldn't do it. A few weeks ago, he decided he was done with the beard and told me he was going to shave it off.

Here is a picture of the beard-removal process (2). He paused for a moment at this point wondering if he should leave the three long pieces hanging down. Josh and I begged, "Please, no." So he continued buzzing.

In typical Tim Felton style, he collected the beard trimmings, created a grotesque beard-ball, and placed it on my plate while I was eating my sandwich. This is my grossed out face.

This is a picture at a friend's wedding later that day.

Josh is just sprucin' it up a little, I mean it is a fancy occasion.

In conclusion, I will leave you with a little collage I made to highlight some of Tim's best looks over the last couple of years. Enjoy.

lovecare.


Footnotes:
(1) This is apparent if you have ever noticed how he dresses or what his facial hair looks like.
(2) I apologize for the chest hair exposure, I realize no one wants to see that, but I was just too lazy to try to crop it out.